10 Feb 2012

Mr Tata, How To Buy Myself An Aquifer in the Himalayas?

For he must surely know the procedure, owning one himself.  How cool is that - an aquifer all to oneself in the Himalayas, the water from which can be sold for the same price as diesel without all the hassle that the latter entails.  I believe diesel can be a bit more difficult to source and all, though I may be mistaken.  

These big industrialists hold all the aces, don't they?  

Hear it from the man in charge, R. K. Krishna Kumar, a Director in Tata Sons: 
We want to partner PepsiCo to distribute Himalayan widely. They have the liquid bottle distribution strength. We don't have that. We can tap that strength to take Himalayan to international markets. Hopefully soon, we will take it to one or two countries. A product like Evian is a source product. Given the uniqueness of the water sources, there is no reason why Himalayan can't be taken to other markets and compete with brands such as Evian. The source, our aquifer in the Himalayas, is a unique source. We have vast reserves. We can tap it, bottle it and make it a global brand.
(Emphasis mine)    So how do I get hold of an Himalayan aquifer?  Once I do that, the next steps are so simple: tap it, bottle it and sell it for a song after entering into a Joint Venture with a global giant:

Tata Global Beverages and PepsiCo India have joined hands to make a foray into nutritious beverages space.
The two have already floated a new company by the name and style of NourishCo.
The joint venture rolled out its first product, Tata Water Plus, on Thursday here at a press conference. Claimed to be the country's first nutrient water, Tata Water Plus is priced at Rs.16 for a 750 ml Pet bottle.
...
“It is taste neutral. It looks and tastes like normal water but with added goodness of nutrients that are bio-available,” says a release.
It had also brought the top-end natural mineral water brand Himalayan (priced at Rs.40 a litre) into the NourishCo fold.

Note the Rs.40 a litre in the last line.  Now, about that nutrient water.  Bio-available doesn't mean what it sounds like.  It does not mean that it comes naturally in the water.  It basically refers to how much of the nutrient can be absorbed by the body.  So I now get a sneaking suspicion that the water is "taste neutral" and "tastes like normal water" because that is what it is - normal water.  Swindle anyone?

Anyway, it is nice to know that our largest industrial conglomerates are on the job of lifting the country out of poverty.  Rs 1L+ nano and Rs.40/litre water and so on.  Hang on, a more affordable tractor would have helped more, you say?  I think you're just jealous of the Tatas.

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