18-Jul-2010

Searching For The One

A clinical psychologist writes on Relationships: mistaking love for lust.  Why do people keep looking for someone who will make them happy?  One is mistaking love for lust.  The other two are the advertising mantras of 'you deserve better' and 'there's a whole world out there, just waiting for you'.  Of course yes. Beautiful faces, carefree smiles, spotless skin, shining cars,  cherubic infants, wide open spaces, dream homes...   

She ends up with some advise:

A better way to live, I believe, is to stop searching outside of the self for someone who can “make” you happy. Happiness, satisfaction, contentment — call it what you will — isn't something you'll find “out there.” Instead, it's something that you'll create when you decide to work with what you already have. Of course, there will be circumstances in which you will have tried everything you can think of, and you've done so repeatedly, and still things aren't working out. But in the vast majority of cases, a change of attitude is all that would be necessary to alleviate the great weight of dissatisfaction so many of us feel. The key to contentment has nothing to do with what you do or don't have. It's all about what you decide to do with what is already yours.

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